The unsaid words
by weirdgrammar
Summary: Kagami just wants to hear Aomine's confession again.


**© weirdgrammar (anti-carrot)**

**Kuroko no Basuke**

* * *

Aomine was dead.

Not literally. In reality Aomine had just cracked open his eyes and he had been there to witness the miracle.

After months of waiting, countless visits to the sterile room, enduring the pungent odor of detergent, whispering words against Aomine's bandaged forehead, finally – finally – those cerulean eyes snapped open so widely before blinking back against the harsh artificial light. He'd never been so quick to leap to Aomine's side before, his left hand cupping Aomine's cold cheek as he planted a kiss on Aomine's brow.

He let the kiss linger for another second; an assuring for him this wasn't a dream. Aomine's raspy voice assured him this definitely wasn't a dream. He pulled away to look into those slightly weary cerulean eyes he adored so much.

It was real; Aomine Daiki had awake! Emotions twirled around his head in delightful way. He lightly squeezed Aomine's hand in his, noticing in a quick note how it went tense. Those cerulean eyes were piercing into his, never wavering and searching—

Wait a second, had they been so this dull before?

Dreadful thoughts suddenly surged through him. He turned pale. The lack of reactions from Aomine rang an alarm in his head, remembering the possibilities Midorima had warned about.

Memory loss.

He gulped down his fear and slowly took a step backward, inside praying hard Aomine could recognize him. He stared at those dull cerulean orbs so long it hurt his eyes. A small part in him was slowly dying at silence they lapsed into.

Probably, Aomine had forgotten about him—

"Taiga."

At the mention of his name, he felt life inject into his exhausted body and he could gather enough strength to capture Aomine into a crushing, longing embrace. He tucked his chin into the crook of Aomine's shoulder, taking in Aomine's faint scent he loved so much and desperately confessed his love for Aomine.

"I love you so much, Daiki. Love you so much. Missed you so much."

Aomine didn't reply.

The ominous feeling came sweeping back. It didn't feel right at all. It was great to know Aomine still remembered him, pronouncing his name without an ounce of hesitation, but he didn't settle well with the lack of reactions. He broke the embrace with a terrified look, his hands on Aomine's shoulders shaking in fear.

"Daiki?"

Aomine's brow twitched a little in response.

"Do… do you know who I am? I mean, who I am to you?" he asked in a wobbly voice.

There was a silence before Aomine answered. "My fiancé of two years."

His heart dropped to his stomach drastically. Yes, Aomine's answer was right. They'd been happily engaged almost for two years now. But that wasn't the trigger of his fear.

It was Aomine's tone; flat and monotone without a hint of loving and missing, as if the word meant nothing to him. As if _he_ meant no one to Aomine. And those cerulean eyes, they were dull and lifeless. There was no trace of excitement or happiness. Just blank, even more blank than Kuroko's powder blue.

This wasn't right. Aomine, the first and true love of his life, who he'd been living together for years, who he'd known for years, took a flat tone with him. His monotone voice didn't sound right to his ears. His ears had grown used to Aomine's specific low pitch and cadence which often portrayed Aomine as an arrogant person. Aomine, too, had this kind of smirk, not just any smirk, but a smirk that conveyed a hidden message; Aomine's undying love for him.

So, when Aomine gave none of them, just a blank look, his fear increased exponentially.

He decided to ask one last question despite the stiff vocal cord.

"Daiki, do you love me?"

Aomine tossed him a confused look with a soft whisper of 'I don't understand'. It was almost inaudible and filled with hesitancy, yet sufficed to break Kagami's heart into pieces.

Aomine had just woken up from a very long coma. Aomine had come back from the borderline of death.

_His _Aomine was dead.

~0~

The day he wrenched open his eyes after slipping into darkness gods know for how long, between the throbbing head, scratchy throat, and confusion drifting across his mind because of the sudden closeness with a certain redhead and the light squeeze on his hand, Aomine felt something amiss.

For a moment, he stared at those chestnut eyes, motionless. The redhead's face had drained its color as if drowning in thoughts. Aomine's mind was in a whirl, and he couldn't collect them into a coherent whole. In his stillness, Aomine forcefully racked his brain, trying to remember the redhead's name.

Then a name popped into his brain. Kagami Taiga.

"Taiga," he said.

The quick change in the redhead's face baffled him. Aomine took in every inch of the redhead's features; shining chestnut eyes, relaxed muscles, the creases between those weird brows had disappeared, slack-jawed in a cross of shock and…

And _what?_

The redhead gave him a crushing hug. Aomine didn't know how to react to the hug, so he stilled. The sensation was warm, and it confused him.

Then a confession spilled out of the redhead's mouth.

_Love you? _What love?

Aomine fell silent. He couldn't find the exact definition of the strange words coming out of the redhead's mouth. He had this weird feeling he'd once known what those words meant but his mind was in a mess. It wasn't until the redhead's voice shook Aomine snapped out of his whirling mind.

The redhead threw him a question. He answered it easily. Apparently, if he tried a little bit harder and ignored the faint throbbing, more information came flickering over his brain.

_Who I am to you?  
My fiancé of two years._

While the redhead was assessing him with those sharp eyes, Aomine had prepared answers for any type of questions. It seemed his memories were left untouched, which was a good thing—

_Daiki, do you love me?_

…except for that.

Aomine was confused. He didn't know how to answer that because he didn't understand the question. He didn't understand the word 'love'.

"I don't understand," he answered.

The redhead looked like he just had a wind knocked out of him that made him almost crumble to his knees. His own fiancé looked… _what?_ He couldn't even find the exact word to describe the look on his fiancé's face, let alone try to comprehend it.

There was one thing Aomine knew; something was definitely amiss here.

~0~

Midorima and his medical team had declared Aomine was suffering from alexithymia, an extremely rare case of the brain injury.

Kagami didn't understand big words.

"It's a term which associates with defects in the awareness and expression of emotion," Midorima explained to Kagami in his office after his medical team had run few tests on Aomine and poured cups of coffee all night long to discuss about Aomine's condition.

It had been a terrifying experience for Midorima to see his own friend lay on that bed and being hooked up with tubes and wires with a confused look that seemed to be etched on his face forever.

He and Aomine never shared a great friendship. In truth he'd been suspecting Aomine never took liking to him since Teikou days. He chose to not voice it out because the feeling was mutual.

However, he couldn't ignore the dull ache in his chest seeing his medical team horde around Aomine. Having to witness one of his friends being wheeled through the door and hurdled by a group of strangers in white coat wasn't something he ever anticipated for while working in this field. And as much as it pained him to admit this, Aomine was still his goddamned friend.

Then there was Kagami Taiga as well, Aomine's significant other and an utter idiot. Midorima didn't like him either. Kagami wore his heart on his sleeve. It didn't take a genius to leaf through Kagami's idiotic mind and figure out his emotions even though he always tried to hide them with a pathetic smile.

That's why Midorima didn't like Kagami. Despite that stupid smile, Kagami's weary eyes and disheveled messy hair and slightly sunken cheeks and drooped shoulders sold out the perfect picture of a miserable man. Kagami loyally stayed by Aomine's side every passing second, slumping against the visitor chair that obviously too small for Kagami's well built, refusing to leave Aomine although Aomine's dead eyes and monotone voice constantly ripped his heart apart. It hurt Midorima to see those usual bright eyes become dull.

When Kagami threw him a quizzical look, which it brought Midorima back to the conversation again, he went on. "Basically Aomine's unable to identify, to describe emotions, and to differentiate them from bodily sensations."

"Meaning?" Kagami's face was pinched. Midorima couldn't help taking pity on him.

Midorima chewed on his inner cheek. He didn't want to break Kagami's fragile heart; Aomine's confused look had done so much damage and Kagami didn't need more knives stabbing his already broken heart. Even so, Midorima had seen that waiting, hoping look way too long – while Aomine had been slipping into coma.

"Emotionless," he breathed out.

From Kagami's crumpled face, Midorima knew he didn't need any further explanation.

~0~

Kuroko paid them a visit the next day. His blank face was partly hidden behind the huge bouquet of flowers he bought from a nearby florist shop. His steps were light when he breezed through the door and he gave Kagami, who was sitting in the chair facing the bed, a warm greeting. Kagami nodded in acknowledgment as his keen eyes studied them discreetly.

Kuroko passed the flowers to Aomine with a welcome smile.

Aomine said thank you. Kuroko gasped.

A brief moment of questioning glances from the corner of the eyes passed between Kagami and Kuroko. Kagami recognized that look. Aomine would never express his gratitude vocally (he was too arrogant to admit it), yet it happened. Kagami couldn't offer him a suitable answer. At least, not in front of Aomine. Somehow he couldn't bring himself to break the news in the presence of Aomine.

Kuroko's look reasserted into blank again before he initiated a casual conversation with Aomine. His voice was calm and soft. The pools of powder blue reflected nothing, too.

Regardless of the blank mask, Kagami could see a shadow of sadness. He knew Kuroko had noticed something was wrong with Aomine and Kuroko didn't like it, yet gave away nothing on his almost effeminate face.

From Kuroko's visit, Kagami learned something new.

Kuroko. Expressionless.  
Aomine. Emotionless.

Emotionless is expressionless.  
Expressionless isn't emotionless.

~0~

Aomine wasn't a great listener.

He was too full of himself and had a tendency to dominate every conversation with his snarky comments or innuendos then followed another stupid argument. Sometimes when it annoyed Kagami, he'd take his own initiative by walking away in silent fume but Aomine's gentle words wouldn't allow their argument to prolong more than few hours.

At hospital, that habit became prominent. Aomine didn't listen to him when he tried to engage Aomine with a simple talk. In normal days, Kagami didn't mind it but this time it shattered his heart. Instead of another stupid remark or insult, Aomine simply slipped away from the conversation by staring out the window at the jagged, lifeless city.

Aomine had never been a great listener. And alexithymia brought it to another whole new level of depression; Midorima informed Kagami that Aomine's lack of sensitivity might cause some impulsive actions, hence ignorance if the subject of conversation doesn't interest him.

"No wonder he simply looks away when I talk to him," said Kagami mirthlessly. His voice was echoing off the walls of the deserted corridor. Midorima gave him an apologetic look. Kagami put on a smile for him.

Kagami never got to hold Aomine's attention on him more than few minutes ever since.

~0~

Midorima finally came clean about his condition while Takao was there helping him with bandage on his forehead.

Alexithymia; emotionless. The way Midorima had said it like it was a virus, and Aomine decided he didn't like it. Takao seemed to notice this and immediately took a short leap to Midorima's side while swiftly sweeping the file tucked at the railing of his bed with him.

More complicated words poured out of Midorima's mouth. Aomine brought his attention away to a bird singing on a branch of the bulky tree outside the hospital the moment Midorima touched about the symptoms.

His ears, nonetheless, caught Midorima saying ignoring was one of them.

After the doctor and the nurse had left, Aomine staunchly told himself that he'd ignored Midorima because he knew better he was fine.

~0~

Two weeks after he'd regained his consciousness, Kise came down to Tokyo to visit him with a box of chocolate. Kagami asked him whether he remembered Kise.

He narrowed his eyes on Kagami and Kise. "How could I forget someone so noisy, over-energetic…"

Aomine found his voice trailing off. His mind was working fast looking for a word to complete the sentence.

Kise leaned in with a weird look on his face as if anticipating for something. "Noisy, over-energetic…?"

Even Kagami, too, had the same look.

"Noisy, over-energetic, full stop." Then, he threw his gaze away at the window.

~0~

Murasakibara visited him too. He said; "Mine-chin is now a robot."

He felt a sharp flare in his chest but his face remained composed.

Aomine wrote Murasakibara off as 'not interesting' and stopped listening to his words which all the time disoriented by Maiubo in his mouth.

~0~

Satsuki cried so hard for him. Aomine kept telling her he was fine, not hurt, still breathing. She wailed louder, her shoulders heaving violently as she choked on her own sobs. Her high-pitched wailing voice kept ringing in his ears that night.

Aomine was at lost.

~0~

"You look fine," said Akashi in a firm tone with an indifferent look before zipping his mouth for the good fifteen minutes to study him and taking his leave after.

Aomine deemed that was what he needed at the moment.

~0~

More people shuffled through the door. His parents. Kagami's father. His detective partner, Ryo, who kept chanting apologies under his breath and blaming himself for the accident befell upon him.

Aomine was only half listening to their voice, too busy trying to rip off the bandage on his forehead or rip the I.V out of the back of his hand until Takao had to rush over to stop him and politely kick them out with his chirpy voice. It gave him a solid reason to not to look at their face.

No, Aomine didn't hate them. What hate?

He just didn't like the look they set on their face. The way those brows were scrunched, the way the edges of their lips tugged downward, their scrutiny, their darkened face, or the way they pressed their lips thin. Aomine didn't like that look.

It reminded him of Kagami. Kagami wore that look the most. And it made his scalp throb painfully.

One day Kagami appeared in the doorway, dressed in a white t-shirt and his worn-out firefighter uniform pants with _those_ eyes. The second he glimpsed it from the corner of his eyes, Aomine rolled onto his side with the bed creaking under his weight, his back to Kagami.

"Daiki," Kagami called out softly.

As long as Kagami wore that look, Aomine refused to face him. And he was still wearing the look like he was molded with it.

~0~

Days later, Aomine was allowed to go home. Kagami had clocked out early to fetch him that afternoon. He leaned his side against the doorframe, waiting for him as Aomine slipped into casual clothes. Kagami refrained himself from frowning hard while he was thinking about Aomine staying with him.

Part of him lamented at the thought of Aomine staying at his parents' place and leaving him alone in their spacious apartment. Part of him begged at him not to face Aomine's emotionless look because his shattered heart couldn't take it anymore.

Aomine caught him staring. Kagami dismissed it with a small rueful smile. It seemed Aomine wouldn't buy it. He let out a shuddering sigh.

"Wanna stay with your parents?" he asked.

"Why? You want me to move out?"

It threw Kagami off completely. He paled dramatically and shook his head in a rapid motion. "No, of course not! I'd love to have you by my side forever, but your look—" he stopped and had to take a deep breath, trying to calm his hammering heart. "I can't _read_ you. It was too—" _emotionless…_ "…blank. And I just assumed that—"

Aomine looked straight into his eyes, hands in mid-air above the bag on the bed. "Assumed what?"

He just assumed.

"That you might not—" _love me anymore…_ "…wanna stay with me anymore," he breathed out, voice slightly shaking.

"I've never said that."

Kagami dropped his gaze on his feet, scratching the nape of his neck. "Yeah, you're right. It kind of slipped out."

Aomine's fingers zipped the bag close. "It happens."

"You're not mad, aren't you?"

Aomine's head snapped up in Kagami's direction again. "What's mad?"

His prompt had Kagami smacked his lips together. Kagami, right then, honestly didn't mean to let it slip out, and now he was clashed with a questioning look from Aomine.

_The _questioning look.

He collected himself together and plucked his side off the doorframe. Kagami turned on his heels and dragged himself out.

"Let's… just go home, 'kay?"

~0~

When Aomine was still in coma, their apartment was in an utter silence.

When Aomine returned home, the deafening silence was still palpable.

~0~

Aomine had an appointment with his psychiatrist every Thursday afternoon.

He expected his psychiatrist to be an old man (or woman, if that mattered) with a head of wild grey hair, wrinkled skin that slowly eaten away by age and wisdom, clad in formal clothes, a brain exploding with knowledge after years of extensive research into human mind.

Aomine expected Professor X from X-men with grey hair to breeze through the door, not Mayuzumi Chihiro in a casual outfit, the former shadow of Rakuzan.

Gods, did it happen. Well, at least he'd been right about the color of his hair.

"You look rather shocked," said Mayuzumi as he picked up a file from the shelf next to the door. "I take it you recognize me," he settled into a chair across Aomine, which had burst at the side and had foam spilling out.

"Yeah, from Rakuzan, right?"

Mayuzumi nodded. "It's good to know that you still have your memory. How's your head?"

Aomine pressed his palm into his bandaged forehead. "Good. Taiga helps me with it."

"Taiga… Kagami Taiga, right?" Mayuzumi flipped through the file in his laps. "I remember him. He gave us a hard time at Winter Cup years ago with his Zone. Heard from Akashi you taught him that trick," he looked up at Aomine again.

"He needed it to defeat you guys."

"That was very determined of you. Kagami Taiga must be very important to you."

"He is."

Mayuzumi reclined on the chair, eyes studying him thoroughly. "You must be very deep in love with him to have to teach him that trick so he could defeat us."

_Deep in love? _What love?

"I don't… get it."

The psychiatrist leaned forward, his elbows on the knees and his hands balling into fists. "What made you want to help him to win against us back then?"

Aomine brought his eyes skywards, contemplating over the reasons that had pushed him to teach Kagami the Zone and reveal its secrets. He hummed before replied. "He deserved it. He wanted to win the tournament so bad, so I couldn't help but give him some help with the Zone. Also, he always made this kind of face every time his team won a match, like just got his first Christmas present ever kind of look. And it gives me weird feeling in my stomach and makes me want to give him that look again, every day if possible."

"So you're saying you love Kagami Taiga so much and his happy look?"

Aomine backed away a little, giving Mayuzumi a perplexed look. "I… don't get it."

"You said you want to give him that got-his-first-Christmas-present-ever kind of look again, every day if possible," Mayuzumi reiterated patiently.

"Yeah."

"Basically you're telling me you want to give Kagami Taiga happiness every day."

"What happiness?" Aomine snapped a question.

"A good feeling."

"Like satisfied?"

Pause. "Not really, but kind of."

Aomine tilted his head in genuine bewilderment. "How is that 'not really, but kind of'? Is it like satisfied or not?"

"A satisfaction feeling to see your loved one feel good," he rephrased.

"What's love?"

"A strong feeling of deep affection for somebody or something."

Aomine's frown deepened.

Mayuzumi tried again. "Like this, you love Kagami Taiga, who is someone that can make you forget about everything else than yourself and him. That's love."

"So, love is a bad thing?" Less a question than a statement.

"Why did you say that?" Mayuzumi began to tap his pen repeatedly on the file.

"If something makes you forget about the world, then it's not good. We shouldn't forget about anything. Everything is too important to be forgotten. A mother shouldn't forget about her child while shopping, then lost him," Aomine gushed.

Mayuzumi fell silent. He stared at those confused cerulean eyes for a moment before scribbling down few notes in the file in an attempt to fight down the shiver settling in his spine. He'd been handling few cases before Aomine's, diving into the puzzle map of human brain with merely a blank stare, and mostly his patients could live a normal life again.

However, as for Aomine's case, Mayuzumi had a voice trumpeted in his head screaming 'this is going to be extremely difficult'.

~0~

Love (From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia).  
It can refer to an emotion of a strong attraction and personal attachment. It can also be a virtue representing human kindness, compassion, and affection—

Aomine closed the tab as quickly as he'd browsed through it. More complicated words messed with his mind, and he refused to think about it any longer.

Then, he put Mayuzumi's name under the list of not-interesting people, below Murasakibara's.

~0~

"Aomine Daiki's file."

Mayuzumi thrust the brown file on the table in Midorima's direction. "Had the first session with him this afternoon," he said softly, above the humming voices and whispers around the café and the pelting raining outside.

Irony, Midorima reflected again, Mayuzumi Chihiro, someone who had the least various expressions became an expert at reading people. If Midorima never stumbled upon him in psychology class back in university days, he would've scoffed at Mayuzumi's certificates.

In spite of the blank eyes, those eyes were sharp and able to map out human mind within one glance. Kuroko never admitted it but Midorima believed that he, too, had this ability and often used it on his precious lights.

Midorima took the file. "How was it?"

"Worse than I thought. But I'm more worried about people around him," Mayuzumi folded his arms on the table to support half of his weight.

Midorima arched a brow high into his green fringes.

"Heiberg concluded that the alexithymic traits were hereditary in nature. So most the family members should have already accepted the patient's condition and able to cope with it," Mayuzumi let a few seconds fly past, allowing Midorima to soak the information in.

Then, he added; "However, in Aomine Daiki's case, he's suffering from alexithymia after the accident," Mayuzumi stressed the word 'after'. "Which changed him from a complete asshole to an emotionless person. Now, let me ask you this; can you imagine your partner who's completely in love with you, confessing his love for you daily, suddenly can't say 'I love you' anymore because he doesn't understand the meaning of love?"

It struck a chord in Midorima. He clutched the file tighter.

Mayuzumi took his silence as his cue that Midorima had grasped his points. He kept staring at Midorima and slowly moved back and settled into his seat. "Apart from the Winter Cup, I don't know so much about Kagami Taiga and Aomine Daiki," he admitted softly, eyes dropping on the file. "How can you describe them for me?"

Midorima shifted in his seat. "They're… both idiots. Always bickering with each other. Before they got into relationship, Kuroko and Momoi had a hard time to keep them from tearing each other's throat. It took a year for them to finally realize about their feelings for each other, and Kuroko had to seek help from us, the Kiseki, to knock some senses into them."

Midorima wanted to laugh as he allowed himself to float with the bubble of memories. He remembered how hectic and chaotic it had been when Kuroko had decided to plan a date for Aomine and Kagami.

"It went surprisingly well. And they become the most ridiculous couple I've ever seen in my whole life. Aomine's too arrogant to care about Kagami's feelings, so showering Kagami with affection in public is part of normalcy for Aomine," he recalled Aomine had suddenly kissed Kagami in the middle of university entrance and Kagami had spluttered loudly in embarrassment and refused to talk to Aomine for the rest of the day. Midorima pulled a tiny smile at the memory. "Kagami, on the other hand, has his own ways to show his affection for Aomine. He scarcely shows it but I know it's there."

"That's… sickeningly sweet," remarked Mayuzumi flatly, earning him a sharp glare from Midorima. He waved it off dismissively. "Well, let's just hope that Kagami Taiga is strong enough to endure with this illness."

At Mayuzumi's comment, a despair picture of Kagami sprung into his mind. Midorima gnawed on his bottom lip. "He's trying his best to endure it. Kagami has been trying his best since Aomine slipped into coma, waiting for him to wake up, and this illness—" he paused to take a deep breath. "It's slowly destroying him. If it continues, I doubt Kagami could take it anymore."

"He has to, if he truly loves Aomine Daiki."

"It's not that easy!"

"Of course it isn't," Mayuzumi cut in curtly with a flat tone. "It never is. However, as a doctor, you know how complicated brain injuries are. We _both_ know it."

Midorima couldn't summon any strength to glare at the other man. He had the point. "We have to do something about this before Kagami does something stupid. We have to rush everything."

"I can't do that," said Mayuzumi. "Everything depends on Aomine Daiki himself. Human mind isn't something we could just prescribe some pills and pray it'll fully heal tomorrow. It's more than that."

"I know. But Kagami's dying inside," he grimaced.

"I can imagine," Mayuzumi whispered. He stared at the file again then hauled himself up to stand up. "I'm taking my leave now," he took the coat that draped over the chair and shuffled off without waiting another word from Midorima.

Midorima was lost in his thoughts. More tables were filled and emptied around him and it was getting late. He couldn't bring himself to care. His eyes were fixated on the file and his palm was pressed into his forehead. He never liked Aomine and Kagami; too stupid for his liking, and how Kuroko could keep his sanity while being around them for so long was beyond his understanding. But hey, his dislike aside, those two honestly didn't need shit like this disrupting their life like that now.

"And here I thought about reporting my husband's missing to police," came a chirpy voice across the table, the wooden chair screeching against the tile as a person filled the seat.

Midorima looked up only to find his significant other grinning happily at him. "Kazunari."

Takao craned his neck to look over at the file. "Is that Aomine's file?"

"Yes, and what are you doing here? You're supposed to be at home," he asked.

"I was, then decided to come over to fetch my beloved husband since it's getting late," Takao's grin grew wider. "You know, my husband is inclined to forget he's, too, a normal human being, especially when it involves his friends," he winked playfully.

Midorima blushed, looking away. "…I'm not worrying over anyone. It's my responsibility…"

"Yes, yes, Shin-chan is _the_ doctor, so he has to take the responsibility. I do understand that. After all, Shin-chan's a tsundere, he'd never say out loud that he cares about his friends," he grinned. Then Takao hunched forward, hand gliding across the table for Midorima's hand.

Midorima was silent at the direct contact of skin upon skin.

"But Shin-chan is my husband, so I should worry over him and ensure he gets enough rest and food," his voice was gentle it gave warmness spreading in Midorima's chest.

_Can you imagine your partner who's completely in love with you, confessing his love for you daily, suddenly can't say 'I love you' anymore because he doesn't understand the meaning of love?_

Midorima linked their fingers together, feeling Takao's wedding ring dig into his skin and warmth envelop his hand. Kagami's dilemma rushed through his mind, and he couldn't imagine if he (or Takao) was in Kagami's shoes; desperate for Aomine's love. He locked their gaze together, deciding to relish Takao as much as he could.

"Kazunari, I love you."

Takao looked so surprised. Then the surprise look morphed into a tender gaze. He squeezed his husband's hand equally.

"I love you too, Shintarou."

~0~

Weekend rolled around. Aomine swung by his parents' house to greet them.

His parents asked him how he was doing.

"I'm fine," and that was final.

~0~

The next Thursday came. Mayuzumi came to his office for the appointment with Aomine Daiki.

Aomine Daiki never came.

~0~

Kagami personally sent Aomine to his psychiatrist's door office. Midorima had rang him and told him about Aomine skipping his session with his psychiatrist. He noticed the name on door – Mayuzumi Chihiro – but said nothing about it. Instead he locked glares with his significant other as exasperation swamped him.

"Please, Daiki, you need this," he pleaded.

"I don't need it," answered Aomine monotonously. His face betrayed nothing either.

"It's important for you, for us. I just want you—" _us…_ "…to be happy again."

Aomine remained quiet at first. "I don't get it why it's so important to you. I'm not hurt anymore, my head's fine. I don't need this."

Aomine's voice didn't jump or drop. It was flat without a hint of emotions. However, his words were enough to hurt Kagami's heart.

"Please…" he begged.

The other man flinched a little then clasped the doorknob. Aomine turned around and threw him a glance over his shoulder. "I'm perfectly fine." Then entered the room briskly.

Kagami's shoulders drooped lower, eyes brimming with unshed tears.

~0~

After the fourth session with Mayuzumi, Aomine moved his psychiatrist's name above Murasakibara's in the not-interesting-people list.

~0~

Basketball.

That was the only topic that could hold Aomine's attention more than two minutes.

Kagami began to subscribe the basketball magazine monthly and pored over it to find a point to talk with Aomine at dinner. The dinner which had been hovered by brooding silence before became livelier, and Kagami was so grateful for it.

Even so, he couldn't ignore the ache in his chest upon hearing Aomine's dry reply.

~0~

Sakurai couldn't bring himself to look straight at Kagami-san's face every time he came over to fetch Aomine-san no matter how many times he'd thrown himself into self-deprecating rounds or begged for forgiveness from the gods.

It was his fault (even though Kagami-san kept telling him otherwise).

Had he been on alarm, Aomine-san wouldn't have to throw himself over him to save him from the collapsing roof. Had he been more careful, Aomine-san wouldn't be so… emotionless.

When the news had rippled through the station that Aomine-san had awake, he'd rushed to the hospital as fast as possible. When he'd seen those cerulean eyes, one thought had crossed his mind.

He'd killed _Aomine-san_.

Then he'd caught Kagami-san's look, whose had sat in the chair. Slouched posture and the weight of despair had etched on Kagami-san's face; right then he'd reckoned he was slowly killing Kagami-san, too.

Aomine-san came back to the station, working again. The chief congratulated him and cheerfully patted Aomine-san's shoulder. Aomine-san kept a straight face. Sakurai couldn't help wincing. That emotionless gaze kept reminding him of his mistake.

For the first time in his life, Sakurai had this great urge to lock himself up in the prison along with other criminals.

Because he, too, was a murderer.

~0~

Aomine was absent from the conversation again when he accidentally slipped out about his job.

Kagami desperately called out his name. "Daiki…" his voice cracked.

Aomine spared him a glance then lowered his head, not looking up at him anymore and wordlessly shoveling another spoonful of curry into his mouth.

He wanted to cry so badly.

~0~

He met Midorima one day in his office. Midorima told him to sit down first. He took a seat across Midorima on a stool.

Midorima clutched his black pants so tightly the knuckles were white and trembling. "There's a high possibility it'll be permanent."

Kagami wanted to scream but the lump in his throat didn't let him.

~0~

That evening, while Aomine was working, Kagami locked himself up in their bedroom, screaming out his frustration.

His scream was bounced back to him like it had been when Aomine hadn't regained his consciousness.

It didn't stop bouncing.

Kagami fell to his knees, sobbing and clutching his head.

~0~

Mayuzumi phoned him Aomine hadn't showed up.

Kagami excused himself from the station, looking for Aomine in the scorching afternoon. He asked Sakurai, Aomine's detective partner. Sakurai, with a mortified look, muttered he didn't see a hair of Aomine then gushed out a string of apologies to him while giving him a forty-five degree bow in the middle of the crowded street. It took him thirty minutes to halt Sakurai's run-on apologies.

He found Aomine hours later sleeping in their bedroom. He gently woke Aomine up. Aomine brushed him away with a flat 'I'm fine' and continued to sleep.

~0~

Kagami told Kuroko over the phone he'd had enough.

Kuroko said; "Don't give up."

~0~

Kise and Kuroko invited them to play basketball one evening.

Kise had suggested basketball might arouse Aomine's emotions, knowing how basketbaka Aomine was. He'd agreed and driven Aomine to the basketball court near Maji Burger.

They played two against two; him with Kuroko and Kise with Aomine.

It was so perfect. Kuroko's Vanishing Drive faded and blazed through the court, Kise's Perfect Copy mirrored his movement, Aomine's Zone broke past his defense, and his own Meteor Jam caused the hoop to rattle violently. The game brought Kagami back to their Seirin days.

Except Aomine's cerulean eyes remained dead. There was no smirk, insult, or whooping sound from Aomine. Just ragged breaths and shouts to get the ball passed to him.

If basketball couldn't bring Aomine back, what could?

~0~

Kagami gave it a try that night.

"Daiki, I love you."

Aomine was startled but didn't reply.

This time his silence had destroyed Kagami completely.

~0~

Silence stretched out between them again.

No more conversation about basketball at dinner, no more voices.

Finish the dinner and sleep.

~0~

Aomine noticed the silence passing between them.

He wanted to say something but Kagami's look often caused him to clamp his mouth shut. He deemed it wasn't the right time to talk about it, about anything.

Also, he realized that Kagami's face contorted up whenever he spoke. He didn't know why, and wanted to ask about it, yet again that look reminded him of the main reason why he refused to speak in the first place.

So he did he thought the best; do not speak.

~0~

"Can you please let Taiga go?"

Himuro's question had him frozen in the doorway, eyes staring ahead into the black iris. It was in the middle of July, and Himuro had travelled down from Akita to knock on his door while Kagami was gone working.

Aomine found Himuro's request ridiculous. "No."

"Why?" Himuro asked, voice growling.

It echoed in Aomine's mind. _Why?_

"He's my fiancé. We're supposed to stay with each other." A logical answer.

"Not if you're hurting him!" the other man barked at him.

"I'm not hurting him," he intoned. "He's not bleeding or—"

"Emotionally! You're hurting him emotionally, breaking his heart!" Himuro snarled.

Aomine didn't know what to do with Himuro's sudden…_ what?_

"He doesn't deserve this kind of treatment! Taiga deserves better than this! The man who once I know, who has the brightest smile I've ever seen, now has reduced to tears. I don't understand why Taiga's still willing to cope up with you—"

Aomine had blocked out Himuro's voice as Himuro fell under the list of not-interesting-people, above everyone else.

Not because he wasn't interesting but his words gave him sharp pain in his chest. Aomine didn't know how to ease up the pain after Himuro had left.

~0~

The expression on Kagami's face became far than worse. Aomine suspected Kagami was sick but he walked just fine, albeit slower.

Bags under his eyes, sunken cheeks, longer fringes, paler skin, tired and dull eyes—

Wait, had they always been so dull before?

Aomine often avoided looking at Kagami's face this few months, so he took no notice the change in the color of Kagami's eyes. As far as he could remember, Kagami possessed the brightest chestnut eyes he'd ever seen, and believe him, as a police officer, he'd seen a lot.

Knowing now the kind-of-sparkles had missing from those orbs, Aomine felt his chest ache and his stomach churn, although he hadn't come down with anything.

He wanted to do something about it, needed to do something to give back those eyes their sparkles.

~0~

He crossed out his psychiatrist's name.

Midorima too.

Kise too.

Murasakibara too.

Akashi too.

Satsuki too.

Only Tetsu was left. He dialed Tetsu's number. Tetsu picked it up after three rings.

"Tetsu, I need your help."

~0~

He met Tetsu at Maji Burger. Aomine spotted his former shadow sitting in the corner of the restaurant while sipping his favorite drink; vanilla shake.

One thing hadn't changed about Tetsu for this few years was his obsession for vanilla shake.

He made his way through the maze of customers and waiters to the table. Aomine didn't comment anything about it or about the noisy slurping Tetsu produced, wordlessly perched himself on the chair across Tetsu. He didn't find it important at all.

"Good afternoon, Aomine-kun," said Tetsu after a while, placing his drink on the table.

"Hey," he replied shortly.

"How are you?"

"Fine."

"Kagami-kun?"

A very long pause then followed a trembling sigh. He noticed Tetsu's brow twitching but said nothing about it. Instead he answered the former. "… I can't exactly say he's doing fine."

"Why is that so?"

"I don't know. He looks… kind of tired, lost weight, paler, sick. Not fever, though," his voice broke on his words as Kagami's image flicked over his mind. "He stops talking to me too."

"So he's finally broken, huh?" whispered Tetsu quietly.

Aomine leaned closer to take a peek at Tetsu's eyes. "Come again?"

"Kagami-kun is sad."

"What's sad?"

Tetsu reached out to point his forefinger at Aomine's chest. "There, he feels this part hurt."

"Why? Is he sick or something?"

Tetsu shook his head. "Not an illness but his feelings. It's not something you can see visibly and it doesn't bleed, but it's hurting you."

"Is that even possible?" Aomine became more puzzled.

"Yes, Aomine-kun, it is possible," Tetsu stared at him unflinchingly. "Actually, Kagami-kun told me he doesn't want to live with you anymore."

"What?" his eyes widened.

"He said he doesn't want to be with you anymore."

Aomine slowly moved away, a thick lump stuck around his throat. He felt his heart clenched. "But why?"

"He's tired of you, Aomine-kun. He wants to leave." Tetsu's voice was loud and clear.

Suddenly Aomine felt something weigh his shoulders down and numbness course throughout his body. He couldn't breathe, his eyes stung, and he didn't know why. There was a voice wailing in his head at the thought of not having his significant other by his side anymore.

"No…" he rasped out.

"Of course not," said Tetsu into the straw of his drink. "Kagami-kun would never let the thought cross his mind."

Aomine blinked clueless, those weird sensations disappeared. "Huh, what?"

"It was an example," Tetsu pointed out. "Those—the things you felt just now—we call it 'sad'."

Realization dawned upon him. A gentle wave washed over him, though a small part of him inwardly growled at Tetsu's lie. His lips reflexively jutted out. "You shouldn't do that, you know. It felt terrible and—" Then it clicked. Kagami's crumpled look flashed across his eyes. His heart arrested for a moment.

"Wait, is Taiga…" he couldn't finish his words.

Tetsu nodded knowingly.

He looked straight into Tetsu's eyes and swallowed thickly. "…because of me?"

"I wasn't really lying when I said he's tired," Tetsu explained. "Kagami-kun is tired of your lack of emotions."

"Emotions?"

Tetsu took a deep breath. "Remember Midorima-kun told you about alexithymia? There are many emotions you have forgotten, Aomine-kun. Sad is one of them. And love. You've forgotten how to love him again."

"Love?" Aomine cocked his head to the side.

"A strong feeling of attraction you have for your precious one, like Kagami-kun loves you and you _supposedly_ love him, too. There are many examples about love, but for time being, I'll give you the simplest one," Tetsu's face hadn't changed. "It's a feeling that makes you want to stay with Kagami-kun forever and make him smile every day."

Aomine was quiet, still having a hard time to comprehend Tetsu's words. Even so, he felt knives stabbing into his heart at the thought of Kagami's twisted look. He opened his mouth again even though he felt the pain in his chest intensify tenfold to even think about it. "So you're saying Taiga is sad because…"

"Because he loves you too much, Aomine-kun, and losing your love hurts him."

Aomine looked down at the table, licking his lips as he blinked, and blinked again when it didn't clear his blurry vision. He still didn't understand the concept of feelings and emotions.

All he knew he'd been hurting Kagami.

~0~

He wanted to talk to Kagami again. But each of his attempts to start a conversation stumped by Kagami's icy silence or his hollow gaze.

~0~

Kagami occasionally caught Aomine's deep voice swimming in his ears, calling out his name.

But facing Aomine's emotionless look always had him turning his head away.

~0~

Aomine didn't give up.

"Tell me more about emotions," he said to Tetsu.

Tetsu began to explain.

It was difficult for Aomine to digest Tetsu's complicated words. It was even harder for him to concentrate on Tetsu's explanation when his damaged brain often failed him.

But remembering it was for Kagami's sake gave him the push he needed.

~0~

Whether it was his imagination or his eyes actually spotted Aomine and Kuroko eating at Maji Burger, Kagami couldn't bring himself to care.

~0~

Aomine's not-interesting-people list:

Himuro Tatsuya.  
Takahashi Kakeru.  
Nakamura Rin.  
Yamomoto Haruto.  
Mayuzumi Chihiro.  
Murasakibara Atsushi.  
Saitou Yui.  
Kise Ryouta.  
Momoi Satsuki.  
Watanabe Ryo…

And the list kept going on and still growing. But Kagami's name never made into the list.

To Aomine, Kagami was too precious.

~0~

"What do you feel when you see Kagami-kun's smile or hear his laughter?" Tetsu asked him one day.

He stared at the table of Maji Burger. "I… like it. They always make me smile, too."

A minute silently dripped past between them before finally – finally – a smile emerged on Tetsu's lips, which Aomine hadn't seen in months.

"That's happiness, Aomine-kun."

He still didn't understand. He accepted it, nevertheless.

~0~

Lately, Kagami left early for work and Aomine often found himself waking up to an empty bed on Kagami's side.

He felt a twinge in his heart at the empty sight and let his head fall back against the pillow.

When he closed his eyes, he could see Kagami's face behind his eyelids.

The bed was empty a second later.

~0~

"It's been awhile I saw Taiga's smile," he confessed.

Tetsu gave him a squeeze on his shoulder and a familiar smile. "You miss him."

~0~

"Kagami, a call," his senpai threw Kagami's ringing phone with an impressive precision across the crowded locker room, which Kagami effortlessly caught it. He swept his tired gaze once on the screen.

Kuroko.

His thumb hovered above the answering button. The phone kept ringing. His senpais gave him not so discreet looks of quizzical. He swallowed thickly and swiped his thumb over the screen. "Hey."

_"It's been awhile, Kagami-kun."_

"Yeah, busy," he grabbed his belongings and closed his locker then headed out the room. Kagami nodded at his lieutenant in respect, who was pacing past him, and shuffled towards the exit. A blast of hot air from the street hit him in the face and he mindlessly resumed his pacing again.

_"I hope your shift has ended."_

"About to. Why?"

_"Go to the usual court."_

Kagami raised a brow in confusion. "Why?"

_"Just go,"_ and the line was cut off.

Kagami stopped in his track, staring at his cell, wide-eyed. He was surprised how Kuroko could deliver a stern command in such a gentle voice. His gaze softened and he pocketed the cell, glancing around.

People were moving around him, here and in his life. His legs, too, started to move of their own accord although he, _his soul_ was still stuck at the moment of Aomine quietly confessing his love the morning before the accident had happened.

Aomine's very last confession.

His Adam's apple bobbed up and down as he struggled to swallow the lump around his throat. Kagami's vision blurred, scalded by his tears as memories of _his_ Aomine floated around in his mind. The melodic affection Aomine had breathed into his last confession kept ringing in his ears. He was yearning to hear that confession again.

To be loved by Aomine again.

It was agonizing, coming home only to see Aomine's emotionless eyes and waking up in the morning to hear his flat tone. He tried everything to tune them out, taking his own sweet time to come home, chomping down his dinner as quick as he could so he wouldn't have to look at Aomine.

Nothing worked. His heart crushed day by day, and nothing he could do about it. Nothing _Aomine_ could do about it. He was drowning in depth of depression and doubted he could resurface again.

He sniffled. _His_ Aomine would never—

"Taiga."

A familiar deep, raspy voice summoned Kagami out of his brooding. His head lifted up, then so did his heart when his eyes laid upon someone he'd missed dearly before shrinking back in anguish as the harsh realization hit him.

Aomine. Still emotionless.

What had he been expecting? Aomine jumping in joy? Ridiculous.

"What are you doing here?" Kagami asked flatly, ignoring the sharp pang of something twisting in his guts when the tone spilled out of his mouth. He cast his gaze around as an excuse to shove the feeling away.

Worn-out net, rusty hoop, dirty asphalt was bordered by old link fences.

_The _usual court. The court where he'd first met Aomine years ago. His legs had carried him and followed Kuroko's command without his consent. Cliché.

"Waiting for you," answered Aomine, slowly approaching Kagami.

Kagami tried hard not to flinch at the monotone voice. It was still breaking his heart. He fidgeted away and wrapped his arms around his middle protectively. It was cruel, Kagami knew, but he needed this to protect himself from getting hurt again. "Why?"

"I want you back."

Kagami looked up and their gazes met; chestnut against cerulean; Kagami's agonized and Aomine's blank. He scoffed; "Well, you have me, every day. We live together, remember? Or you knocked your head again and forgot about it?" he couldn't help the sarcasm.

Aomine shook his head. "No, not like this."

"Then, how do you want us to be?! Me, babysitting you?" Kagami almost – almost – snarled at the other man out of frustration. His mind was in a huge mess. He wanted Aomine to stopped talking. It gave him headache. Aomine's emotionless face, Aomine's flat tone, they were killing him. Hadn't Aomine had enough of ripping his heart apart?

"Taiga, hear me out—"

"To your flat tone?!" Kagami interrupted. "Having to look at your emotionless face?! No way!"

"Please."

"Even your plea sounds so flat, meaning nothing," he hissed. "I tried to talk with you, you ignored me. I begged you to go to your therapy, but what did you do? You skipped and insisted you're fine when you're actually not fine at all! I confessed to you and what did you reply? Nothing! Do you know how painful it was?! Wanting to be loved? Losing you every day even though you're still alive and walking around our apartment? Do you?! Oh wait, you're emotionless, you don't feel anything!"

"Taiga—"

"Stop torturing me with your emotionless mask, Daiki," Kagami croaked, waves of despair rushing through him. He balled his trembling hands into fists. "I can't take it anymore. Too much for me to bear," he dropped his gaze on the asphalt, pressing his hand against his forehead to rub away the tears pooling in his eyes.

Sullen silence hung in the air.

"Lo—Love," Aomine suddenly stuttered out.

Kagami's head snapped up so fast it almost gave him whiplash. His heart stopped. He zeroed in on those cerulean eyes with brows scrunched up. His ears were ringing and his body was trembling.

Did Aomine just…

Aomine took a last step and held Kagami's hand.

Kagami's breath hitched at the contact.

Aomine carefully closed the distance between them, his dull cerulean eyes never leaving Kagami's teary. "I still… don't understand about feelings or emotions. They're weird… and confusing but I'm trying, Taiga," he paused for a moment. "I'm trying to learn them because I don't want to see that weird look on your face again. You look hurt, and I don't like it. Your smile, I want to see your smile again."

"I'll do anything," Aomine added, voice slightly trembling. "For you. Listening to you or talking to you… I know it's going to be difficult because my brain is stupid and always stops focusing on you, but I'll try. Talk to me again, come back to me, I'll… I will come back to you. I promise."

Kagami kept staring at Aomine, almost not believing his own ears and eyes. He thought he was dreaming because Aomine, _the_ emotionless Aomine wouldn't be able to express them. His permanently damaged brain couldn't arouse or interpret the emotions in him anymore.

However, Aomine's strong, shaking grip proved him this wasn't a dream. Aomine's face was blank as a white paper, but in his voice there was a subtle note of desperation.

"Taiga, I lo—love you."

It was laced with hesitancy, and Kagami reckoned Aomine probably had seen somewhere from dramas and decided to mirror the play.

But it didn't matter.

Nothing mattered anymore when he felt the sincere, determined squeeze Aomine gave on his hand. An evident of _his_ Aomine was still alive, buried somewhere behind the emotionless mask. _Aomine_ was still there, he knew it. And he was more than willing to give them both a chance again albeit the uncertain future.

He rested his forehead on Aomine's and closed his eyes, allowing tears to stream down his cheeks freely as he savored Aomine's warmth blanketing over them.

For the first time in… too long, Kagami smiled and kissed Aomine's lips.

_I love you too Daiki_ left unsaid, but they both knew better.

Action speaks louder, they say.

_~Fin~_

* * *

**A/N: **Sorry for the rushing ending... (,,X_X,,)

Do drop a review~


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